Live in Hog Country

5 yard penalty?

Bobby Petrino is out at the U of A – so let me be the first to say I was wrong (look I’m not infallible!) I like many others who thought he would keep his job made assumptions That weren’t really based in fact.

For example I assumed that while Bobby lied to the media – I didn’t think he was stupid enough to lie to Jeff Long. He seemed like such a smart guy.

I also assumed it was just an affair and not borderline prostitution – Petrino paid Jessica Dorrell $20,000 plus got her the cushy job as his assistant making 50K a year.

I  guess the ending was inevitable. A story like that would have eventually gotten out with or without the accident. Arkansas is a small town. Especially online.

I don’t know about you guys but I am Petrinoed out.

For anyone who has been living under a rock for the last week and has no clue what I am talking about here’s some local coverage of the story.

So now the scuttle butt question all over the state is will Petrino lose his job? My answer is “Are you on Crack?”

Winner Winner Chicken Dinner

  <———-Look at this and mark my words. This man will be coaching at Arkansas  next year. Why? Look how big that  Trophy is!  The state of Arkansas doesn’t care that the coach got laid by his twenty five year old assistant

                   THIS STATE DOESN’T CARE HOW MUCH YOU LIE, CHEAT, ACT CORRUPT, AND ABUSE YOUR POWERS -  AS LONG AS YOU ARE A WINNER.

This state has seen a multiple scandals involving women and state troopers. It never stopped Willbur Mills from being re-elected and it didn’t stop Bill Clinton from becoming President. In fact by having a State Trooper cover up his illicit affair Bobby Petrino has joined the ranks of some of the “greatest ” Arkansans.

He is currently on paid administrative leave while Jeff Long thinks about what he is going to do. My guess is that will last until summer practice and then they will sneak him back onto campus with little or no announcement – when presses Jeff Long will say something along the lines of  – ‘problems in his personal life need to be worked out but he has an excellent job performance record and we’re not going to give up on him’ .

If I was Bobby, I would personally thank all those kids who worked so hard to give him a big trophy and job security.

I’m sure in another twenty years they will name a highway or a library  after him. As long as he keeps winning. No one in Arkansas likes a loser.

If  was Mike Anderson, I would stay off motorcycles and away from personal assistants. If this had happened to him he would be fired already.

  Not because he’s black – because he had a terrible season. 6-10 in SEC play…That’s worse than the guy they fired him to replace.

<—— No big trophy here – just a guy trying desperately not to lose his best players to the NBA.

This is a chemical that you can use to wash the chemicals off your veggies with.

This is popsicles for your dog.

Once upon a time in a chat room… someone who we will call “Kevin” asked “What’s a really inappropriate Broadway Musical for a child?” to which I replied “Sweeney Todd”

a year later this happened.

Mind you Sweeney Todd performed by one child in a Kevin Smith film  staring Ben Affleck as a widower who rents too much porn, is one thing…. but this is blowing my mind…   – The Children’s Theatre Zanesville will debut the school edition of Stephen Sondheim’s masterpiece, “Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street”

I guess it’s a good thing I didn’t recommend The Vagina Monologues.

In different regions the focus of the celebrations ranges from general celebration of respect, appreciation and love towards women to a celebration for women’s economic, political and social achievements. — from Wikipedia

Women Never Forget

I guess in America the Republican’s have decided to celebrate by alienating the female vote.

In Virginia Some Republican Governor Who Won’t Get Re-Elected gifted the women of his state by signing a controversial bill requiring an ultrasound for most abortions. While the mandatory intrusive vaginal ultrasound was removed from the bill’s wording, critics of the bill say that forcing a woman to pay for an ultrasound on a pregnancy she is terminating is putting government into the exam room and forcing women into decisions they wouldn’t make otherwise. (Can you say Birth Panels?)

Meanwhile….

Rick Santorum and  Rush Limbaugh  have flooded the airwaves with outrage over insurance companies paying for birth control.  And the Market Driven Media has flooded the airwaves with outrage over the outrage!

I don’t understand how this can even be an issue in this day and age?

I understand why Santorum ‘s all anti birth control – He’s truebluebatshitcrazy. For him it’s about a religious faith and silly facts about our country’s religious freedom will never change his views.

Rush Limbaugh is another matter.  Rush isn’t motivated by faith, or ethics. He’s addicted to wealth and fame. What he wants is a blurb in every paper, a sound bite on every newscast – which he thinks will increase his listeners, and  grow his brand. He’s hoping it will translate  into higher ratings allowing him to charge more for his advertising spots and stick more money in his pocket. In the past his over-blown rhetoric has served him well, and made him a rich man, but this week his blow hard bull shit backfired in his face and he lost a bunch of advertisers… and now only Ashley Madison wants him.

If you are wondering why Mitt Romney has decided to sit the fence and stay out of this debate – he hasn’t  – as it turns out… Mitt Romney is Rush Limbaugh’s boss.

Romney’s company Bain Capital OWNS Clear Channel, which is the broadcast company the Rush Limbaugh works for.

Think about that for a minute.  Creepy huh?  Wait I can make it creepier:

Bain Capital also owns Hospital Corporation of America… and we all know what happens when people have babies, hospitals make money…. so Bain Capital makes money… that’s why Mitt Romney wants you pregnant, not because he s anti birth control, but because your hospital bill will make him money.

That’s kinda fucked up.

You know it’s a bad International Women’s Day when even Fox News is asking what is there to celebrate.

CBS News offers us this heartwarming story of a woman who battled against her negative self image to create a line of girdles that are hip and fun. The self made woman who managed to build a billion dollar empire out of women’s insecurities without any help from a man, got to be the second cover of Forbes Magazine’s Billionaire issue this week. Way to break thru the glass ceiling! Today we slut-ute you!